conversations with my mother

If you've read my profile page, you may remember that my mother ('mutti') is a midwife- she has great personal style but doesn't care about fashion. At all. Thankfully, she appreciates beautiful clothing and is resigned to the fact that I spend a large percentage of my earnings on expensive apparel, but every so often we have a conversation that goes like this:

"Do you want me to get you a pair of those shoes from Wal Mart while I'm in the States?"

"What?"

"The shoes I got last time- they were only $7.99. I'm going to get a few more pairs for work"

"Um, no thanks"

(Pokes head out of bathroom- has lime green underwear wrapped around her hairline keeping her red curls back while she applies makeup)

"Don't be a snob- you wore my shoes to work the other day"

"That was an emergency situation and will never be repeated in this life"

"Anyway, the label says White Stag, not Wal Mart, and they are really comfortable"

"Mutti, they are $8 flat plastic shoes- please stop or I will eat your head"